Sunday, August 1, 2010

Fresh Beginnings

Waking up this morning and "slapping a smile" on this  ol face, then saying "thank you God for a new day" ... wow... a gift.... A new day! Yea!  A fresh start.

Yesterday is behind me and today I may a choice to live in the moment.

Forgetting the woes of the past and the worries of the future.

Live IN THE MOMENT.  A fresh new day!  

Like a  fresh clean canvas to paint a new picture. 

I'm in the middle of reading a book Life is Short-Wear Your Party Pants by Loretta LaRoche who is an internationally know stress-management consultant who advocates humor as a coping mechanism (my kind of girl).

Since her advise is not based in biblical principles, she states and advising waking up  saying "I'm back".  Ha, what a crack up!  I'm baaaaaccckkkkkkk"  LOL

Well, being Sunday and the 1st of August (another 21 day starts), I'm excited.  I've hit a 20 pound loss today!  whooeeee.   I started this last Oct 09.  That's right.  9 months.  Wow, it's like I just gave birth to a 20 pound pig! HA!  And, it's not just the loss of weight.  It's more than weight.  It's finding my "groove".  Choosing to feed my spirit is now more important to me than feeding my face! (eating is an Italian tradition that's very important).

It's choosing to feed my body daily (muscles, cellular level...) with
       ACTIVITY, exercise.  I'm stronger!
It's choosing Life giving food !
It's about what I desire to eat... not what I can't eat (like most diet plans).
A new me!  A new 50 something year old me!

Yesterday, I actually ran across the street before the light turned red.... I felt much lighter running.  I use to feel like I carried 10 pounds of weights on each foot as I was trying to  run,  not to mention a  loss of breath! I can actually RUN - WOW.

So, today is very exciting for me.

Then, this morning as I sought to feed my Spirit I turned on TV and find "church" and watched Joel Olsteen - he spoke on toxic people in our lives.
There's that buzz word, toxic!

Don't get me wrong, I believe in joining a community of believers (yes, church on Sunday's).  But, when You can't get there.... Feed your spirit
with a virtual "church".

So, back to the lesson today on Toxic people.
I've attached a list of the types of toxic people we should "close the door on".  As he said, "you can't fly with the Eagles if your hanging with the turkeys".   It's also good to look and see if people in your life consider you toxic.  There's a thought.

Matthew 7:3-5  

 3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

Be Careful in your life.
Surround yourself with those who build you up, encourage you....
pray for those in your life that are naysayers (for they are thieves that rob you)! Bless them with your positive upbeat, "I can do it" words.... But, know your limits when to walk away and not let them become a noose around your neck. And don't enable them with your kindness to manipulate and use your goodness.
Thats my sermon for today!

John 10:10  

 "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; 
I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

I have learned during these 9 months -
I need the Lord (who came to give us life abundantly!)
I do best with journalizing and having other's join me and hold me accountable. (you may not know this but as I blog... it's as though "you " are with me... keeping me accountable, an lending me encouragement.
I need to honor and respect my body, mind and spirit

I cherish my life.... respect that it is a gift from God and can be taken at any moment.
I am in GOD's hands.... but I have a responsibility to care for what he has given me.

I desire an amazing joyful life....
I choose Health and Wellness....
My choice

Salute!  May you hear the music of Life today in your mind, body and Spirit and it feed you the blessings of Amazing Joy, Hope and Peace


8 Toxic personalities to avoid
 Although we like to think that the people in our lives are well-adjusted, happy, healthy minded individuals, we sometimes realize that it just isn't so.  Personally, I've had moments where I'll be skipping through my day, happy as can be, thinking life is grand and BAM, I'll be blindsided by someone who manages to knock the happy wind out of my sails.  Sometimes it is easy to write it off and other times, not so much.
Maybe you are a positive person, but when you are around a certain individual, you feel negative.  Or, maybe you have an idealistic view of the world and when you are with certain people, you are made to feel silly, unrealistic or delusional.  Or, maybe you pride yourself in being completely independent and in control of your life, but when you are around a certain family member, you regress into a state of childhood.
Some of these situations, and yes, these people, can have a tremendously negative impact on our lives.  And, although we are all human and have our 'issues,' some 'issues' are quite frankly, toxic.  They are toxic to our happiness.  They are toxic to our mental outlook.  They are toxic to our self-esteem.  And they are toxic to our lives.  They can suck the life out of us and even shorten our lifespan.
Here are the worst of the toxic personalities out there and how to spot them:
1. Manipulative Mary: These individuals are experts at manipulation tactics.  Is a matter of fact, you may not even realize you have been manipulated until it is too late.  These individuals figure out what your 'buttons' are, and push them to get what they want.
Why they are toxic: These people have a way of eating away at your belief system and self-esteem.  They find ways to make you do things that you don't necessarily want to do and before you know it, you lose your sense of identity, your personal priorities and your ability to see the reality of the situation.  The world all of a sudden becomes centered around their needs and their priorities.
2. Narcissistic Nancy: These people have an extreme sense of self-importance and believe that the world revolves around them.  They are often not as sly as the Manipulative Marys of the world, but instead, tend to be a bit overt about getting their needs met.  You often want to say to them "It isn't always about you."
Why they are toxic: They are solely focused on their needs, leaving your needs in the dust.  You are left disappointed and unfulfilled.  Further, they zap your energy by getting you to focus so much on them, that you have nothing left for yourself.
3. Debbie Downers: These people can't appreciate the positive in life.  If you tell them that it is a beautiful day, they will tell you about the impending dreary forecast.  If you tell them you aced a mid-term, they'll tell you about how difficult the final is going to be.
Why they are toxic: They take the joy out of everything.  Your rosy outlook on life continues to get squashed with negativity.  Before you know it, their negativity consumes you and you start looking at things with gray colored glasses yourself.
4. Judgmental Jims: When you see things as cute and quirky, they see things as strange and unattractive.  If you find people's unique perspectives refreshing, they find them 'wrong'.  If you like someone's eclectic taste, they find it 'disturbing' or 'bad'.
Why they are toxic: Judgmental people are much like Debbie Downers.  In a world where freedom rings, judgment is sooo over.  If the world was a homogeneous place, life would be pretty boring.  Spending a lot of time with these types can inadvertently convert you into a judgmental person as well.
5. Dream Killing Keiths: Every time you have an idea, these people tell you why you can't do it.  As you achieve, they try to pull you down.  As you dream, they are the first to tell you it is impossible.
Why they are toxic: These people are stuck in what is instead of what could be.  Further, these individuals eat away at your self-esteem and your belief in yourself.  Progress and change can only occur from doing new things and innovating, dreaming the impossible and reaching for the stars.
6. Insincere Illissas: You never quite feel that these people are being sincere.  You tell a funny story, they give you a polite laugh.  You feel depressed and sad and they give you a 'there, there' type response.  You tell them you are excited about something and you get a very ho-hum response.
Why they are toxic: People who aren't sincere or genuine build relationships on superficial criteria.  This breeds shallow, meaningless relationships.  When you are really in need of a friend, they won't be there.  When you really need constructive criticism, they would rather tell you that you are great the way you are.  When you need support, they would rather see you fail or make a fool of yourself.
7. Disrespectful Dannys: These people will say or do things at the most inappropriate times and in the most inappropriate ways.  In essence, they are more subtle, grown up bullies.  Maybe this person is a friend who you confided in and uses your secret against you.  Maybe it is a family member who puts their busy-body nose into your affairs when it is none of their business.  Or maybe, it is a colleague who says demeaning things to you.
Why they are toxic: These people have no sense of boundaries and don't respect your feelings or, for that matter, your privacy.  These people will cause you to feel frustrated and disrespected.
8. Never Enough Nellies: You can never give enough to these people to make them happy.  They take you for granted and have unrealistic expectations of you.  They find ways to continually fault you and never take responsibility for anything themselves.
Why they are toxic: You will spend so much time trying to please them, that you will end up losing yourself in the process.  They will require all of your time and energy, leaving you worn out and your own needs sacrificed.
All of these personalities have several things in common.  1) the more these people get away with their behavior, the more they will continue.  2) Unfortunately, most of these people don't see that what they do is wrong and as a result, talking to them about it will fall on deaf ears, leaving you wondering if you are the crazy one.  3) Most of these people get worse with age, making their impact on you stronger with time.
Frankly, life is too short to spend your time dealing with toxicity.  If you can, avoid spending mucho time with people who are indicative of these behaviors and you'll feel a lot happier. Have you encountered these personalities?  What have you done?  Any personalities you would add?

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